Jesus decides to totally hook his disciples up with some super powers, giving them all the power to heal the sick and to cast out devils, like he’s been doing. The apostles names are:
Simon who is called Peter , Andrew Simon/Peter’s brother, James of Zebedee, John/ James’s brother, Philip, Bartholomew, Thomas, Matthew (the publican), James the son of Alphaeus, Lebbaeus Thadddaeus, Simon the Canaanite, Judas Iscariot
And without so much as a spoiler alert he tells us Judas Iscariot betrays Jesus.
Jesus send his posse out telling them not to bother with Gentiles (non Jewish folk) or Samaritans, just focus on people of Israel. Let them know that the “Kingdom of Heaven is on hand” heal the sick, the lepers, raise the dead, caste out devils, give and receive freely. I don’t know about this raise the dead stuff, that is wicked spooky and unnerving. Impressive yes, but still unnerving.
But don’t prepare for your journey, no extra money, coats, shoes, you will get what you earn. When you go to place find out who is worthy, and stay at their house. When you come into a house salute it, if the houses is worthy give it peace, and if it’s not worthy let your peace return to you. If they won’t listen to you shake the dust off your feet as you leave, because that place is worse than Sodom and Gomorrha on the day of judgment! That’s dramatic! I mean weren’t they consumed by fire and brimstone? Wow.
So I’m sending you as sheep among the wolves, to be as wise a snakes and as peaceful as doves. But watch out for men because they bring you in front of the council and um… scourge you in the synagogues. And they’s bring you before governors, and kings about my teachings. But don’t worry about what you’re going to say because you’ll know what to say at the time. Because it’s the Spirit of your Father who is speaking through you.
So brother will give up siblings, father his child, children will rise against their parents and cause them to be killed. Wait what? That sounded really violent. And you will be hated in my name, but if you endure it you will be saved. Um, okay. When they persecute you in one city, just go to the next one, I tell you you shall have covered all of the cities until I’ve come.
The disciple is not about his master, the servant isn’t about his lord. They should be happy just being, as their master and lord, not above them. And if they call their master Beelzebub what else are they calling of his house?
Don’t be afraid because everything will be revealed. I talk to you in the dark and you’ll be the light. What I whisper to you shout from the rooftops. Don’t be afraid of dying because the soul can’t be killed, only fear the one who is able to destroy both body and soul in hell! That must be Satan! And these last couple of paragraphs have been filled with scary stuff.
Do they sell two sparrows for a farthing? One of them won’t fall on the ground without your father. The hairs on you head are numbered, but don’t worry you are worth more than a bunch of sparrows. Okay... what?
When you confess me, I will confess to my Father in heaven. But if you deny me I will deny you to my dad. Don’t think I’ve come to send peace on earth, I’m not here for peace but a sword. I’m here to cause strife between man and father, daughter and mother, daughter in law against mother in law. Man's foes will be in his own house. Oh man that sounds like big trouble.
If you love you father, mother, son, or daughter more than me than you aren’t worthy. Um JC, I think you might be taking this a bit far… If you don’t take your cross and follow me, you aren’t worthy. If you find your life you’ll lose it, if you lose your life for my sake you will find it. What? Sorry what? What’s wrong with finding your life? That doesn’t even make sense. Even less sense than the sparrows which I didn’t understand because I don’t know what you do with sparrows or what their worth is.
He who receives you, receives me, and receives my Father. He who receives a prophet, in the name of a prophet, shall receive a prophet’s reward. Whatever that is. And he who received a good man, in the name of good man, shall receive a good man’s reward. If you drink give one these a cup of cold water in the name of a disciple, he won’t lose his reward.
Huh? Why would he… Okay these last sections have confused me. According to the Christmas carols I’ve know JC was totally sent to bring peace on earth and good will to man. Oh man. This JC is so angry. I like the loving JC better.
Um, I didn't come to bring peace on earth, but rather to sow chaos and hatred. JC is the antichrist, and a fine job he's doing, just look how many wars are fought under religious banners. One thing this guy really knows how to do is make trouble. Come Jesus, come back to the light and talk about loving your enemies and that sort of stuff.
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