Mark Chapter 4

Mark Chapter 4

I guess Jesus had enough of the mountain so he headed back to the seaside to teach some people there. As usual, too many people surrounded him and he had to high tail it to his boat, leaving all those suckers on the beach. Not to fear though, "he taught them many things by parables". Well, thank goodness! Why make something clear when you can make it convoluted, that's what I always say!

His first parable is about a guy who sows seeds. Some of his seeds fall by the wayside where the fowls of the air come to eat it up (these fowls apparently represent the devil). Some seeds drop to a stony ground where there wasn't a lot of dirt and immediately they spring up because there is no depth of earth, unfortunately as any gardener can tell you the roots won't take in that kind of soil, so when the sun comes up it whithers. And some seeds come down in the thorns and the thorns grow and choke it so it doesn't yeild any fruit. But still, the rest fall on good ground and do produce fruit at varying levels: thirty, sixty and a hundred (for those of you interested in biblical numerology).

You might be thinking, okay, I think I get this metaphor, but I could use a little clarification. Well, Jesus says, if you have ears then listen up (too bad deaf folks, I guess you're out of luck). Then he pulls his main group aside, his apostles and a few others that really bought into his line of thinking. In the gospel according to Mark in the King James bible (1769 ed) the actual quote is, "And he said unto them, Unto you it is given to know the mystery of the kingdom of God: but unto them that are without, all [these] things are done in parables:" The way I interpret that line is, you guys get it. I can just straight up tell you what's happening, but for these non-believers and those who are not in the "in" crowd, I've got to paint it in pictures so they can understand it. Ask a biblical scholar about it... but that's what I get. You'll also notice there's a colon at the end of the sentence, so that would imply some type of list is going to follow if I recall my grammatical rules correctly. Well, you're right. JC lists off the problems that can be encountered by the "them that are without": they may see something, but not really get it, they might hear something but not understand what the heck is being said (heck yeah, put me in that category), and I think what he concludes is that the main point they're missing if they would understand what he's saying and convert then all their sins would be forgiven. And I say to JC, well, try to make it a little easier to follow. Oh yeah, and be nicer to your mom. I wouldn't marry a guy who isn't I'm sure not going to go around letting some dude who ignores his family tell me how to live my life. But, hey that's just me. I think I already established in Chapter 3 that I'm bound for eternal damnation.

Then Jesus asks his little group, haven't you heard that before? If you haven't how will you understand all the parables? If I was on that boat, I'd be like, I guess I won't and swim for it!

JC come back to that guy who was sowing but he kind of asks you to imagine that instead of seeds this dude is sprinkling words all about town. So, when he sows the words by the wayside people hear them, but immediately Satan comes and takes them away (you recall those devil birds I mentioned earlier). When they hit the stony ground people are super happy to hear them and embrace the ideas but since no roots are planted their enthusiasm doesn't last. When something goes wrong (sickness, death of a loved one, failure of varying sorts, ect...) they give up. If the words are sown among thorns then the vices of the world like deceitfulness and lusts choke it and the beliefs do not blossom. No wonder no one could ever really convert me, I'm like a wayside full of thorns! Of course if the word falls on good ground then it bears fruit. In other words, these are like the folks who knock on your door. They believe so much they'll convert thirty, sixty or hundred more people. Well, that explains that. Thanks JC. That was surprisingly more clear than what I've read so far in the good book.

But, by now we know JC's teaching style. It's a bit erratic. So, he makes a little leap into a life lesson that all of us would do well to remember (I guess). He asks them, again I will quote directly, "Is a candle brought to be put under a bushel, or under a bed? and not to be set on a candlestick?" At this point I would think as a safety issue that indeed we would not want a candle under a bushel or bed because they'd catch on fire. My answer to JC's riddle is that indeed, the best place for a candle is in a candlestick. Let's find out how I did.

Jesus answers... drumroll please... "for there is nothing hid, which shall not be manifested..." Uh... so bushel, bed, or candlestick? Come on JC, work with me. "neither was any thing kept secret, but that it should come abroad." Okay, well, I guess he's not going to tell me. Fine. I know it's a candlestick, anyway. I'm sure of it. Right? I guess now he's just telling us that if we keep secrets eventually they're going to come out. He again asks those that have ears to listen (and again, no luck if you're deaf or hearing impaired). He tells those folks who ARE listening to think about what they've heard and if they take to it. He'll give them some more knowledge of his teachings. Just in case you haven't gotten the point by now he repeats again, if you have understanding of what he's saying then he'll keep teaching you, if you don't then whatever you have understood is going to be taken away (not entirely sure how he'll manage that little feat, but he's the Son of God, so who am I to question). Bored yet with this whole line of thinking? Well, tough luck because the son of man has more to tell us on this very topic. He preaches some more about planting seeds which we now understand to mean preaching. He reminds us that their is a pattern to seed growth wtich is first the blade, then the ear then the full corn in the ear (oh I guess we're planting corn), then you immediately need to cut it with a sickle because it's harvest time! Woo hoo. Wait, are people ears of corn that need to be cut with a sickle? Don't know how you harvest your flock of converts, but apparently it's important that you do.

JC seems to get a little lost and asks either his group or himself what he should compare the kingdom of heaven to? I don't know, usually I hear it compared to a sunny day with big puffy clouds, but whatever.

I guess for Jesus it's more like a mustard seed which is less than all other seeds in the earth (really? Poor mustard seed, I never thought of you like that). No to worry for the mustard seeds feelings though because when it shoots up it becomes greater than all other herbs (JC won't eat a ham sandwich without it! hee). And the fowls of the are are able to lodge in it's shadow (I guess these aren't the devil fowl). And I guess that's what heaven's like something small that grows enormous. Hmm, I've never heard it described that way... the bible really is a fascinating read.

After the what is heaven parable, JC tells them a whole bunch of other parables that we're not privy to (I feel gypped I don't know about you). But when he was alone again with his discliples he told them everything without parables. It's not totally clear when he's with his friends and when he's with the group, but since parables are for suckers then any time he's giving us a parable more than just his disciples must be around.

That night his says to his cronies, "Let us pass over unto the other side." Whoa mama! Are we taking a trip into another world, will we find out what happens after we die? Nope, they just send away the masses and go to the ship. Apparently there was a point when he wasn't on the ship that they forget to mention to us. The writer of this particular gospel is not big on giving us the settings that things are taking place in, he's also not big on transitions, but whatever there was a lot less literature being written back in the day. They didn't have amazing templates for what makes great writing. The gospel does choose to make note that there were some little ships accompanying JC's boat. (I'm not sure why we care, but there it is).

A great storm arises and everyone freaks out. JC is asleep when some one of his grovelling followers wakes him up asking why he doesn't care that they are all about to die? JC is probably a little grouchy about being woken up from his sleep. He opens his eyes and yells at the wind and sea and tells them both to be still. Well, he's the Son of God, so apparently they listen. Then he turns to the disciple and asks why he was so chicken about the whole thing, doesn't he have any faith? That's nice, right? Like these dudes are used to having some powerful magician who can calm the sea around them.

But these guys aren't really calmed, in fact they're even more afraid (reasonably so, I think) and they ask each other... who the heck is this guy? and how'd he do that?

This was a long one and I think I've said enough. Go back to bed JC, you're nicer when you're asleep, wind or no wind.